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Madison Beer is the only woman I’ve ever seen that can dress cuter than a button and still have a better body than that of most exotic sports vehicles. It also helps that her face is hotter than freshly caramelized sugar. It’s even sweeter too, because if I had to pick between a lifetime supply of caramel dipped candy apples or spending the rest of my lifetime with Madison, I’d choose Madison every time. I was unaware that bikinis were even sold in a soft pink. It looks like a nice change of pace from the vibrant colors I’m used to seeing. But to be honest, Beer could wear just about anything and I would still be impressed.

I don’t know too many people who would be opposed to the idea of a Beer on the beach. I’d bring Beer with me to every beach adventure if I could. I think I’m going to be a bit more proactive this year and make my way down to the shore early in the morning. Because the early bird catches the worm. And by catching worms I mean get the best views in the house of Madison. So I just may sit on the sand at 4 a.m. until she shows up and be as casual and nonchalant about things as possible.