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For a moment I thought Louisa Warwick was the daughter of Warwick Davis and I was filled with an unexpected amount of happiness before realizing that is not how names work and in reality there is probably no relation. I say probably because I refuse to look it up and confirm it only to unleash that sort disappointment upon myself. I would rather keep the slim chance of it being possible alive.

I do not exactly know why I want Warwick Davis to have a beautiful daughter so badly. For some reason it feels satisfying to think of such a squat man having a child in fashion shows. It gives hope to all the paper bag wearers out there that their genes are not doomed to an existence of rejection and ridicule.

Regardless of what breeding stock Louisa comes from I think it is safe to say she lucked out on what she inherited. A pelvis like hers is what bikinis were made for, but they come around so rarely that the full potential of the swimsuit is rarely realized. I just thank her for having the courage to wade into ankle deep water in order to have an excuse to put one on.